Sometimes manners suck!

The boys have been sleeping in the same bed together for a couple months now.  So far, it's going well.  It means daddy can put both boys to bed at the same time and mommy can have some much needed time to herself.
The other day, though, we woke up to screaming and yelling coming from their room.  We tried to ignore it and hoped they'd just roll over and go back to sleep but no such luck.  They came running into our room screaming and yelling...dang!
Big was yelling, "Yeah, you have to!"
and Small was yelling, "No, I don't!"

When we finally got them calmed down, we found out what the issue was...

Apparently, Small tooted in his sleep.  Big was awake at the time and heard him.
So naturally, he told Small that he had to say "excuse me!"
When Small stayed asleep, Big thought he was ignoring him and got mad.  So he told him louder that he needed to say excuse me.
At which point, Small woke up to his brother yelling at him to say excuse me and he had NO CLUE what he had done!
Awesome!

Three Cheers for Boppy!

Santa has been super kind to my kids this year.  He decided to send them their very own elf!  Not just any elf, mind you...a special elf!  One that watches over the kids during the day and reports back to Santa at night.  Most days, Santa sends a special book back for the kids to read.  But on days where the boys have been particularly naughty, there's no book to read...one day, there was even NO ELF!!!  Wow!  They must have really upset Santa that day!

The kids decided to name him Boppy Doodlebop.  I kinda hope we get a new Elf next year that we can give a more silly name to.  Something like Thomas or Everett would be a much sillier name for an Elf...but that's just my opinion :)

Most days our Elf is found just kicking around the house...sitting on his book, staring out windows, stuffed in a stocking.  Today, in fact, he was found trying on some of the kids socks in their sock basket!  Silly Boppy!!  They're too big for you!

About a week ago, Boppy was found in Big's bed with a pullup on.  "He's so silly, mommy!", Big said.  And the day Boppy built a tower out of blocks for the kids, Big made sure he built a bigger tower for him...and then he built a fence around it to make sure Small didn't knock it down....unfortunately, when Small sees blocks in any configuration, he figures they're meant to be knocked down.  Oops!

The other day, the kids found Boppy on the counter making snow angels...OUT OF FLOUR!!!  "That Elf is so silly, mommy!" Big said.

Small, on the other hand, just. can't. stop. himself.  from touching Boppy!  He tickles his tummy..."Just a little tickle, like this mommy!" or he touches his hat, or he knocks him on the ground and picks him up.  Big is horrified by all this.  "Mommy!!  <Small> touched Boppy!!  He's going to lose his magic!!"

I explained to Big that day that Boppy is a little more understanding of impulsive toddlers.  So far, he hasn't lost his magic yet and he keeps coming back!  Yesterday he even brought a hot wheels track for the kids!!  Wow, Boppy, you've outdone yourself!

<Sigh>  Christmas is only a few days away and I'm sure Boppy will be happy to be home at the North Pole...away from poking fingers and not having to find silly things for the kids to find him doing.  But, I'm sure a part of him will miss his special boys.  I'm sure he'll miss them thanking him every day for their books and making sure he's sitting beside them with part of their blanket so he can listen to the story, too.  I'm sure he'll miss watching over them at night to make sure they go to bed like civilized people.  I'm sure he'll miss hearing my explanations of why he can't talk back to the boys and how he only talks in "ELF" to Santa.  I'm sure he'll miss Small having conversations with him about Santa and what Santa eats for dinner, etc.

I wonder if Santa might consider sending us a New Year's Angel and a Valentine's Cupid and a St. Patrick's Day leprechaun and all sorts of other little people to make sure the boys behave for the rest of the year. 

What do you think Santa??  Come on...I know you've got a little something extra in that sack for me??? 

:)

Video Killed the...

Every year since Big was a baby, I've been making movies of my favorite pictures and video clips from that year.

Last night, I started working on this year's montage.  And to say I was starting to get discouraged is an understatement. I sat for a couple hours staring at pictures and videos and tried to come up with a theme.  I eventually just gave up on the thinking part and started throwing clips together. 

No one ever really watches these videos.  I like watching them when they're done and I give a copy to both sets of grandparents.  I think they like watching it...once.  But, after that, no one else really cares. 

So I started wondering why I was wasting so much time on them?

And then I had an epiphany. 

I decided to show my kids their video from last year this morning. They were enthralled!  They loved watching themselves when they were little.  They pointed out their scooters and they remembered about their old bike helmets and they marvelled at how Small couldn't talk at one point???

And I realized that these are the things that help shape the kids memories.  Without these pictures and reminders of the things they've done when they were little, those adventures will become a distant past.

So off I go to make this year's video a masterpiece...no matter how much time it takes :)

We're off to see the Wizard!!

I decided to take Big to see the Wizard of Oz last night.  I haven't had a date with my dude in a long time so I think we were both pretty excited :) 

We started off the evening with his preschool concert.  You know those videos you've seen of the kids standing at the back looking miserable?  That was my kid!  He HATED IT!  Actually, HATE doesn't quite express how he felt about it.  He was miserable and pouty and I could tell it was taking everything in him not to wail.  Poor kid.  I guess me and his grandparents laughing from the audience probably didn't help.

Anyhow, after said concert extraordinnaire, we ditched the littler guy and headed out on the town.  We had some snacks before the show and he was pretty much raring to go once the show started.  He was excited to see the "scary parts" and to see the Wizard.  About half an hour in, he said, "Hey!  Wait a second!!  There's no Wizard in this show!!"  Hahaha!  Gotta be patient kid!

When the munchkins came out, he laughed along with the crowd but I don't think we really got it.  He said they were "shrunken people".  After intermission, though, the guy sitting next to him (for the ENTIRE PLAY) came back in and sat down.  He was tall and had white hair and could have maybe sort of kind of looked like one of the actors playing a munchkin maybe??  Well, Big looked at him and said, "Were you one of the munchkins?"  Both of us just looked at each other and laughed. 

At one point, Big yelled out, "I wish <Small> were here! He'd really like this!"  So sweet that he thinks of his brother :)  He even told me this morning that it was fun to go watch but that he missed his brother.  <sigh>  Sweet :)

But on the way home, right before he fell asleep, I asked him what his favorite part was.  He said, "I don't know, mommy!  What was your favorite part?" 

I said, "Hanging out with you, buddy!"

He said, "I think my favorite part was going to McDonald's first!"

<sigh>  I guess breaking my 20 year ban from McDonald's to make sure he wasn't a hungry, cranky mess was a good choice :)

A snippet into my life...

Big: "Mommy!! <Small>'s eating a cotton ball! Make him stop!!"

Me: "Where did he get a cotton ball?"

Big: "I took it off his art! Make him spit it out! I don't want him to die!"

Me: "Did you just swallow a cotton ball, <Small>?"

Small: "Yep!"

Big: "WAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!! Now he has to go to the doctor!!! WAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!!"

Me: "<Small>, why did you swallow a cotton ball?"

Small: "Cuz it's funny!"

Big: "He's going to die, mommy!! Why did you eat a cotton ball? It wasn't cotton candy, you know!! WAAAAAAAAHHHHH!"

5 minutes of serious consoling later:

Big: "Do you feel like you're starting to die, <Small>?"

Bully's

I was driving the other day and Big asked me what a bully was.

I told him it's someone who's not very nice and treats people badly.  They say mean words, hurt people and exclude them from things.  I reminded him that it's not nice to do those things to anyone and that you should always treat people the way you want them to treat you.

And then I asked, "Do you understand?"

And he responded with, "Yeah, mommy.  You mean a bully is like all the other reindeers when they wouldn't let Rudolph play in their games!"

That kid rocks :)

Not quite a stork!

On the way home from soccer tonight, I got the dreaded question..."Mommy, how do babies get into their mommies tummies?"

I was tired...stunned...verklempt...and so I copped out to the traditional, "That's a question you better ask your daddy!"

But as I drove another couple blocks, I figured daddy would probably be even more tired...stunned...verklempt...and might go into full confusing detail of how babies get in their mommies tummies.

So I decided to give it a shot.  Here's what I came up with on the fly...

"That's a really good question, buddy!  I'm glad you asked.  You know how they get in their?  Their mommy and daddy hope and wish with all their might for a beautiful baby to love and then all of a sudden a baby is there!"

"So do daddies have boy babies and mommies have girl babies?"

"Nope, only mommies can have babies.  Daddy's don't have the right parts."

"What kind of parts, mommy?"

"The really tough one's that build strong, happy babies."

"And daddies don't have those parts?"

"Nope, they're just not tough enough!"  :)

"Then how do the babies get out of their mommy's tummies?"  (Nothing gets past this kid!)

"Well, the mommy hugs the baby tight for as long as she thinks the baby needs to feel safe and strong and when she thinks the baby's ready, she lets go so he or she can come into the world.  But, she still hugs it tight and loves it as long as the baby lives so that he or she always knows that it's mommy will take care of it!"

I think I did pretty good, don't you?

The hazards of shopping

I became a statistic last week.  Not a good one, either! 

 

I took my kids grocery shopping at Costco the other day and thought I had them safely tucked inside the shopping cart.  Sure, Small wasn't sitting totally down but he was crouched back on his haunches at least.  And sure he was looking over the back end of the cart but he was holding on and 99% of his weight was pushed back into the middle of the cart.  It seemed a heck of a lot safer than having them clinging to the outsides of the cart somewhere.

 

And then I hit a bump...a fairly awkward bump...and I obviously hit it harder than I expected.

 

Small was pretty much launched into the air and sent head diving into the ground.  He hit the road with the crown of his head and then flipped over onto his back.

 

I'll just let that sink in for a minute....

 

Naturally, I was pretty horrified.  In fact, the whole thing still terrifies me!

 

But, the kid literally had NOTHING on his head!  Not a bruise!!  Not a bump!!  Not even a minor cut!  NOTHING!!! 

 

And that, quite frankly, terrified me more than the actual incident.  How many stories have you heard where people die of bleeding brains with no warning?  

 

I pretty much shook for the next three hours.  And, of course, in the middle of that time frame, I called the Nurses Hotline.  

I don't know why I bother calling the Nurses Hotline.  Nine times out of 10, they tell me to go to a doctor or hospital right away...just to be safe. So, really...if I'm concerned enough to call the Hotline, I should just skip the middle step and go straight to a clinic or hospital.

 

Either way, they started talking about skull fractures and I SWEAR I felt a minor dent in his head..so off we went to a clinic!

 

Two hours of singing and playing and dancing in the waiting room later, Small was a happy, happy camper and I feel a bit like a loser for wasting the doctor's time. But, you can never be too sure with head injuries!

 

The doctor told me how he'd been entertained with Small's rendition of the alphabet all afternoon (I guess he was louder than I thought in the waiting room...oops!) and did some minor checkings of his skull and assured me that he was fine. I practically begged him to find the dent that I SWEAR was there and he just chuckled at me as if to say, I bet you could find something wrong with him if you looked hard enough!

 

He did suggest we wake him up sometime in the night to make sure he could be roused and I told him that wouldn't be a problem since the kid wakes us up every four hours as it is. Situation normal!

 

Final verdict a week later? I still feel like a tool for launching my kid out of the shopping cart in the first place. But I'm fairly positive the kids will be a lot more compliant to sitting down in the cart than they have in the past.  And Small?? That kid is a little spitfire, let me tell you!  Not one iota of injury on that kid's head...I can't even find the dent anymore!!  Now if only we could get him to sleep better.....

Who's Great Idea Was This?

No, SERIOUSLY!  Whose great idea was Halloween??

I mean, I totally don't get it. Like who in their right mind would want to give their kids ample supply of candy, late in the evening, right before bedtime!  And then continue to supply them with candy for the next 3 months?  It's so bizarre to me that anyone would come up with such an insane idea!

No MOM would have thought it was a good idea! That's pretty obvious!!

I have a theory, though. I think this is the real story behind Halloween:

A bunch of dads are sitting around a hockey rink drinking their Timmy's and watching their kids play a game.

Dad #1 says, "My wife only cooks me healthy food! I need more sugar sugar sugar!!"

Dad #2 replies with, "You're telling me, man! If I eat anymore quinoa..."

At which point, Dad #3 says, "You know what?? I think we should get strangers to give us sugar! That's the ticket!  Then our wives can't tell us we can't have it because it was a gift!  And you know as well as I do that they wouldn't want to offend anyone by not taking the gift!"

Cheers erupt from the audience...the kids on the ice look at the dads and yell, "There was no goal!!  Why the ruckus??"

And the dads yell, "EUREKA!!  WE JUST STRUCK GOLD!"

But there was a flaw to their plan...any old dude showing up at a strangers door was likely to be met with slammed doors in their faces. No one opens their door to packs of strange men! That's just crazy!!

Until....

Dad #1 reaches genius status:

"I've GOT IT!! We'll get our KIDS to do it!! We'll dress them up in super cute costumes that no one can turn their backs on and the strangers will throw oodles and oodles of chocolate and candy at them!!  IT'S BRILLIANT!!!"

And so we get Halloween. A mom's worst nightmare. A kid's biggest dream. And a dad's best goal scored!

Life Father, Like Husband

When I was 12, my parents took me and my sister on an amazing trip to Europe and England. My dad told us all kinds of crazy stories about his youth...none of which were really role model material.  After each of them, he'd repeat, "Do as I say, not as I do!"  Lucky for him, we were really good kids and there was no chance we'd do the things he did!  Nuts!!

There was one major memory in my head from that trip, though. I think about it often when I see my dad with my kids.

We went to visit his friends who lived in this massive castle...at least, that's what I remember it looking like. They had two little boys. They were probably about the same age as my kids are now. One of the little boys fell and hurt himself and I remember my dad going through some ancient witch doctor healing ritual with the kid.  It was things like, "rub your hands together and say Poof!  Go away ouchie!" Then he took a feather, rubbed it on the kid's knee and blew on it until the kid was giggling from the tickles.  He was totally distracted and had no idea his knee had a gaping wound on it, nor did he care.  He was up chasing my dad in no time.

I remember thinking how awesome my dad was to be able to help a little kid like that.

Fast forward to present day...

I've been really easily frustrated lately.  My job is really stressful right now and Small is still waking us up every four hours at night so I'm tired, impatient and grumpy.  My kids drive me batty quite often with their fighting and saying mean things to each other.  My response is many times inadequate with the ol', "Would you PLEASE STOP HITTING YOUR BROTHER????"  It never works.  I don't know why I bother trying.

But, the other day, I noticed that my husband is a star at distractions. He gets the kids up and playing a game. Or he makes silly noises and gets them laughing.  He does all kinds of things to get the kids doing what he wants them to do.

And the other day, when he started rubbing Big's knee because it hurt and then they both blew on it and started giggling, it reminded me of my dad and the little boy at the castle.

I always knew both my dad and my husband were amazing dudes.  But, I guess I never really realized how similar they are in how they deal with kids.

I guess the old adage about little girls marrying their dads has some truth to it!

Either way, I guess I got lucky in both respects!
 

Trick or Treat

It was my birthday this weekend!  Yeah, yeah.  Happy birthday to me.  Thanks :)  It's really not that big of a deal!  I'm not 40...yet...so I'm not officially middle aged...right?  Whatever.  Age is a state of mind and I still swear I'm 27 so that's all that matters :)

Either way, my kids have been stoked about my birthday!  Like beyond stoked!  They've been waiting for Halloween because that means it's mommy's birthday!!  They've been asking me about my party for ages...who's coming...what costume I'm going to wear (because it's of course going to be a costume party :) ) and what kind of cake I'm having.

If you've followed my blog at all, you know I'm big into cakes for my kids birthdays.  Well, I've obviously done a good job making them feel special with their cakes because they were dumbfounded when I said I probably wouldn't have one.  What?  No cake??  What kind of party has no cake?

So the first thing my kids wanted to do when we got up in the morning was put on their costumes...to get ready for the party :)  Then they waited...and waited...and waited...still no party!  "When are your friends coming, mommy?"  "They're not coming, honey!  All I need for my birthday is you boys!"  Eventually, the costumes came off...the waiting stopped and they moved onto other things.  I think me booting off to Costco was a bit of a buzz kill for them :)

Then we headed out for dim sum...which was really the only thing I wanted to do for my birthday.  They were all excited because they thought they were finally going to my party!  "Where's your party, mommy?  At the park?"  "No, honey.  We're going to a restaurant for lunch."  

Didn't sound cool...nor did the half hour wait time to get in!  But, yum!!  Was the dim sum ever good!  And can I just say how awesome my kids are?  They tried everything we ordered!  Ok, so we don't order things like chicken feet and tripe and stuff that looks like science experiments to me.  But, they did eat this black bean sesame thing that looked like a pile of black stuff in a bowl.  If I didn't know it tasted good, there's no chance I would have tried it!  Those kids didn't even bat an eye!  Small actually gobbled it down as quickly as he could get it in his mouth...and on his shirt...and down the front of his chest...and all over his face...he was a mess by the end!  Situation normal :)

After lunch, we decided to finally head to the pumpkin patch.  It was rainy and muddy and wet and the pumpkins were almost all rotten so we had pretty much the whole place to ourselves.  The kids said they had a lot of fun and wanted to go back tomorrow.  "How about next year instead?"  "Ok, mommy!" 

The rest of the day was spent at home cooking dinner, carving pumpkins and eating cake...Yep!  I did actually get cake :)  My husband is really good at making sure i get my favorite on my birthday...DQ Ice Cream Cake.  MMMMmmmmm!!!

All in all, it was a great day.  I didn't see any friends or do anything super spectacular, nor did I get any presents.  But, the best thing was that I was with my 3 favorite dudes and I couldn't have been happier!

Happy Halloween everyone!  Stay safe!!